Note from editor: This story mentions domestic abuse. If it is something that can trigger you, please proceed with caution.
Hello! My name is Laron.
When I was younger and growing up, I never had a girlfriend or even wanted to get married. I saw a lot of my friends and family go through bad and negative relationships. I even saw my best friend slowly drink himself to death after a failed relationship.
Also, growing up, I was picked on and bullied a lot, and women had no interest in me. So for most of my life, I was by myself as I didn't trust women.
But then at 35, I met someone online. At first, she was really sweet and kind to me. She said she was abused by her son's father. And we ended up together and finally married.
There were some red flags early, such as her cussing out people at any mistake that was made – restaurant workers, customer service workers over the phone, etc. Even her 5-year-old son at the time.
I don't know why I ignored these behaviors, but I did. I learned a long time ago that how people treat other people, they'll treat you the same way.
We went to therapy before we got married as I thought that would help sort out our issues. It did for a little, but her behavior persisted.
We got married anyway, even though I had concerns. She also watches all these ghetto reality shows, and murder shows and listens to a lot of gangsta rap music which I no longer was interested in because of all the violence it promotes. I had to start sleeping in the other room because she would stay up all night watching violent TV shows.
She has panic attacks at night. The doctor even told her to watch something calming at night to help her sleep. She did put on rain videos but not until 12 am and even at times 2 am in the morning.
Once I told her my concerns with this and even the second therapist we went to and about how she continued to be verbally abusive to me and her son.
The only person she would listen to is her sister giving her tarot card readings, she had her own issues such as being on drugs and her own abusive relationship.
As I began to study the Bible and surround myself around positive people, I started to realize this wasn't everything I wanted. I was tired of all the negativity and the criticism from her. Nothing was ever good enough for her. Anytime she didn't get her way, she would throw a tantrum like a child, yelling and cussing people out.
The last straw was when she got mad because she felt like I didn't support her nail business after she quit her job.
I simply told her she was going to have to work at it, and she wasn't going to become a millionaire overnight. And to stop watching all those negative TV shows.
That set her off. She then, as usual, started yelling and cussing again, proceeded to remove the router to try to get me fired from my job, insulted me and my family, and threatened to go cheat on me.
I had enough of her verbal abuse, and we got into an argument. She then physically attacked me smacked my glasses off my face and called me names. She threatened to have someone beat me up. I then called the police to prevent any further abuse.
I had to leave my home so she would no longer threaten me. If it wasn't for the Gratitude App, my faith in God, and other spiritual studies like Buddhism, I would've never left.
I have since talked to therapists and the domestic violence hotline. I have been informed that men go through domestic violence too but it's not reported.
I write poetry to help men cope with their emotions better, as men don't get to express their feelings as often as women do. We are taught to keep and hold them inside, which causes severe mental and emotional damage to men.
I want to share and tell my story to help any man who may have been abused, help them express themselves in a healthy manner, and feel good about themselves!